here's your periodic reminder that "being trans" is simply not identifying consistently as the gender you were assigned at birth! it doesn't mean "transitioning", nor "taking hormones", nor "getting surgery". It doesn't even mean dressing differently! (though many trans people do several of these things!)
also! nonbinary folks are trans generally speaking! You can opt out of the trans label/community, but being nonbinary inherently meets the singular condition of being trans mentioned above!
I -often- see questioning nonbinary folks who seem to struggle with whether or not they qualify as trans, or are trans, etc.
it's a valid thing to ask yourself, but if you're nonbinary, you already qualify for being trans, whether or not you decide to transition. just so y'all know. you can be trans, right now, and you don't have to earn that or qualify for it in some way.
Some binary folks are exclusionary of nonbinary folks, and want to say things like "you need to have (a certain kind of dysphoria)" or "you have to see a doctor" or "you have to dress differently" and none of this shit is true
also! gender-neutral pronouns != being non-binary! binary people can use gender-neutral pronouns! nonbinary people can use he/him and she/her! etc.
Also I’m terribly sorry, I’ve gotta put a dollar in the “periodic reminder that...” jar, i try to be better than this 😅
@poss_bot But (among other things) be prepared for gatekeepers from both cis and trans circles who want to view things as absolutes.
@poss_bot Gender cops. If they weren't messing with you, personally, they'd be messing with someone else.
@poss_bot this is a genuine question, what might be a reason for a binary person to prefer binary pronouns? Any reason they have is valid and should be respected, but I haven't come across that before I don't think and am curious.
@Pan_Natek excellent question!
"non-binary" is sort of an umbrella for many different identities, including agender (having no gender), genderfluid (changing gender or gender expression periodically), bigender (being two genders simultaneously), as well as demiboy + demigirl (mostly, but not fully, identifying with a binary gender), and countless others. Not every non-binary person is completely removed from binary gender!
@Pan_Natek Some non-binary people like getting a mix of pronouns (I've known people that like they, he, and she being used for them interchangeably). Some non-binary people still identify with man or woman (Rebecca Sugar of Steven Universe fame considers herself a "non-binary woman", for ex). Others find it socially safer to use he or she pronouns because they're more well known to the general populace + it allows them to avoid outing themselves as non-binary or trans.
@Pan_Natek The underlying theory to the post you replied to is essentially just that pronouns are an aspect of identity that is not DIRECTLY coupled to gender. It's loosely coupled, perhaps, and strongly correlated with gender, but it is not one and the same with it.
@poss_bot thank you for the thorough explanation! That makes sense :)
@poss_bot I think this is largely due to patriarchal conditioning.
@poss_bot Last part applies to agender and intersexed folk as well~.
Thank you for your support, but intersex (it's not "intersexed") folks aren't inherently trans, as they are assigned a binary gender at birth, and can identify with that assigned gender (and so be cis) or not (and so be trans), and agender folks *are* nonbinary ;)
Some gender talk
I can speak for some agender folks as I am agender and have discussed this with others - the only ones not identifying as nonbinary when I encountered them thought that nonbinary meant a specific gender other than man or woman, rather than the umbrella term of "not always entirely a man or woman" that it is, and once they learned the common definition changed to also considering themselves nonbinary
Some gender talk
@Corax Apologies for getting the term wrong. I think I had covered the ground by stating it was the last part... that people can opt in or not.
@poss_bot as a binary trans person who's doing or wants to do all of the things u just said, i endorse this message
@poss_bot It all definitely needs saying, I and plenty of people I know have struggled with this for a good long time.
@poss_bot I really needed to hear this, tbh. I've been having lots of enby impostor from feeling like I'm not "trans enough" even though I'm on HRT. It's easy to spend a lot of time around 'binary' trans folks and feel that you're somehow 'too close' to your birth sex.
.@poss_bot It gets me down we still need to remind people this.
Also remember folks the oposite is true to you can be non-binary and take HRT & have surgery too if that's what you need!
Also you can take as long as you like to figure out where you sit on the spectrum. I've been out and through everything for years and I'm still working out where I fit!
The social network of the future: No ads, no corporate surveillance, ethical design, and decentralization! Own your data with Mastodon!